Story- I wanted to

It was evening when I looked outside, the sky was clear, a light breeze was blowing, some children were playing cricket in the park. “You are out” someone screamed at the top of his lungs, must be Sudhir, he always screams like that when he doesn’t get batting for a long time.

“What are you thinking Mr. Daydreamer” Gaurav sir snapped at me in his heavy voice, Suddenly I left the park and came back to my small study room, where I was solving the trigonometric equation, “this is what you call concentration?” He again snarled at me, I was unable to answer, so I decided to let him speak, anyway, they all speak, nobody has to listen to me. He was still glaring at me, “Show me your copy” he said and then snatched it from my hands, “Answers of Three Questions are wrong” he said. But seven answers are correct too I thought, but didn’t utter a word !!

Suddenly mom entered the room with a cup of tea in her hands, Gaurav sir’s tone magically changed, he said “Satyam you are a bright child I know, but you lack concentration and practice, you are not working hard enough”, mom’s expressions became tightened, I can see the hint of disappointment on her face.

Anyways Gaurav sir left, and  I sat down with my head bowed on my study table and started thinking that in a while Tiwari sir would come to teach physics and till the evening he would go cricket match will be over.

Dinner was served at the dinner table at night, suddenly dad asked how are my preparations for board exams are going? I knew that the answer to this question will be given by him only, he is just asking me for formality, I said it’s fine.

He continued, Gaurav sir was saying you are not studying well, I sneaked at mom, I know that she told this to him, she didn’t look at me, I didn’t utter a word, I knew it’s of no use, they have already decided what they wanna say and believe, 
“Do you wanna spoil our family’s name and reputation ?!?” He grunted I didn’t speak, he went on “you know the amount I am spending on our studies, your schools, your extra tuitions?” And here u are goofing around” his voice became louder, “tell me if you don’t wanna study at all?” “You wanna become a vegetable seller or what? ” 

I sat there quietly with my head bowed, absorbing whatever words were thrown at me, after dad got up from the dining table, mom sat beside me and said “just tell me Satyam why do you do this son? , see how hurt he is, why do you do this? I didn’t say a word again, it’s of no use !!! 

Last year my cousin sister scored 94% in her board’s exam, from that day, dad and mom became participants in an unknown competition in which I was their horse on which they were betting, the stakes were high even the ambitions were but I was left behind, but who cares ??

The next day, dad said enough of wasting your time Satyam, from now there’s another maths teacher who will teach you after school and then Gaurav sir will also teach you maths but a different chapter, like this you can complete your syllabus in half of the time and will have ample time for revision !!! I just felt like screaming, like scream my lungs out, but I just said “ok” 

And today is the result day, the day for which I just feared the most Cbsenic. in the site keep collapsing, again and again, even the site can’t bear such amount of pressure, whatever !!! 

Mom was constantly praying, luring god for 1kg ladoos (sweet) in exchange for my good marks, sorry my bad for my 95% 

Finally, the site responded, I scored 89%, I think that God didn’t like the bargain !! I was happy because I worked hard for this, and I got what I deserved but the world around me was in a complete state of shock, the ground beneath my mum’s dad’s shook !!! Dad gave me a disgusted look, mom was sad !! Well, this is what I deserved for not getting into the 90’s line !!! Relatives keep calling, adding fuel to my dad’s anger and making my mom weep more and more.

 My house was looking like someone has died and everyone was mourning the loss !! My friends and teachers keep on congratulating me, but that means nothing to me now, I just wanted to see these two people happy !! But destiny has different plans !! My neighbors asked my dad to celebrate as their kid has scored a whopping 89% but dad told them “Satyam is sad, he didn’t want to celebrate “

I didn’t WANT TO???, does anyone care in this house, what I wanted,??, NO  because no one ever asked, what I wanted !! 

β€’>I wanted to play cricket for my school team, which you didn’t let me join.

β€’>I wanted to celebrate every festival with joy and without the guilt of wasting my “precious” time.

 β€’>I wanted to go to the picnic with my classmates which I didn’t go to, due to a silly test.

β€’>I just wanted to ask out my crush for an icecream date.

β€’>I just wanted to live a life of a normal teenager.

β€’>I didn’t want to join 2 classes for a single subject. 

β€’>I didn’t want my friends to call me a ‘nerd’.

β€’>I didn’t want to lose my best friend because I couldn’t give him time.

β€’>I just wanted to be happy, which you didn’t let me to.

β€’>I just wanted that you people had appreciated my hard work.

β€’>I just wanted to listen “proud of you son” from you people instead of you are ashamed of me.

I  lost my friends, my cricket team, my crush, my self-esteem, my social life, my happiness because you were obsessed with some numbers !!!
I wish it some kind of story, where I can tell you people about my feelings, and you just realize your mistakes, and with tears in your eyes you would say “I am proud of you son, I am sorry” 

But it’s real life and not a movie, things don’t sort out in the real world like that, If I can say my feelings to them, I will be labeled as a spoiled and misbehaving child!!! So I did exactly , what I am good at, I went to their room and said “sorry, for letting you down”

The next day, dad just entered my room and said “Satyam it’s high time you should realize what harm you have done, and to rectify this mistake you have one chance, here’s the form of IIT coaching classes, fill it,


Β© Storytime with Shivani, All rights reserved

94 thoughts on “Story- I wanted to”

  1. Very relatable story Vani. Its been proved time and again the percentages and numbers doesnt always matter. But still the cycle continues. If only parents spend time to listen to their kids instead of hear.

    1. The number 90% is so hypnotizing which makes them forget about their child’s happiness 😐😐
      Thank you so much for reading ❀❀

  2. I can understand this feeling!!! 89% are gud enough… πŸ‘πŸ» It’s not about the competition I think but the knowledge u get from ur studies. That’s why I love studying. Oh and his life is hard. He lost his best friend, crush and his hobbies. That’s soo bad πŸ™πŸ™ Who are these parents??? Who stop a child from doing all this stuff.

    1. If you love studying for gaining knowledge, you are on right track Anushka and you have a bright future ahead ❀❀❀
      Sometimes overexpectations can make people blind ❀❀

  3. Harsh reality. Most parents pressurise their child into stidies and the sterotypical IIT instead of asking what is it that they want.
    Loved this story

  4. Education and learning must not be forced. Willingness is much more important. This post is really Educational for such weird parents. Great one Vani β€πŸ˜‡

  5. This is so heartbreaking! I think our education system and the mentality of parents has to be blamed for this. I’m in 10th grade and my parents also expect me to get 95+ marks but I’m happy that they are not pressurising me in any way and letting me learn at my own pace. But unfortunately, I have many friends who have to go through this and I hope that soon, a time will come when knowledge will be given more importance than marks.

    1. ummmm but day by day the craziness for 90% is increasing, I see many students around me like this and I don’t know how their own parents can’t see their children ‘s pain ….
      Anyway Thanks for reading ❀❀❀

  6. Eeeeeeeeesh sad story πŸ₯ΊπŸ€­ many parents in India fail to recognize what the child needs is right in front of them. πŸ₯ΊπŸ’”

    1. I don’t know how their own parents can’t see their children ‘s pain ….that’s very strange πŸ€”
      Thank you so much for reading ❀❀❀

  7. The story is so real and it is the thing that plagues a lot of childhood–over ambitious parents do so much damage to a child’s life that they should practically be sent to psychological counseling.

  8. This story is so real and that makes it even sadder. Parents should be there with their children when they feel low instead of pressurizing them😞

  9. This is the hard truth to many kids in reality. Emotions are ignored for the sake of numbers. I pray that this story shouldn’t be someone’s life.

    Beautiful write as always. ❀️❀️
    Missed few of your posts. Catching up now 😊😊

    1. sadly this is the story of many students out there … hope things will change …
      Thank you so much for reading ❀❀❀

  10. Sometimes, emotions are that much high, you can’t even cry.
    Story relates to me. However, my parents never forced anything on me.
    It was bad decisions from both sides.
    That time passed.
    May every Satyam find true path & bit courage to introduce his interests.
    Excellent piece of work, shivani.

    1. Awwww I am so glad that you liked this, means a lot to me ❀❀❀❀
      Yes bad decisions hurt way lot than anything πŸ’”
      Thank you so much for reading ❀❀❀

  11. Story so many students can relate to, I was also disciplined by my parents but not at the cost of other things and once I was old enough, they just trusted me and my decisions. It was a hard shift for them to accept my choices but they are happy now. Both child and parents need to find a common ground and for that there should be a open communication. Sadly, most parents see that as back answering. It’s really sad and your story made me feel all of it.

    1. And that’s how parenting should be… sadly many people in our country doesn’t understand that 😐😐
      Open communication is what needed 😌
      Thank you so much for reading ❀❀❀

  12. Amazing work! I wish I could like this twice for how accurate it is. Oh, that time of the year! πŸ˜… I remember it β€œfondly.” Would have happened this year too, if exams didn’t get canceled due to covid. THANKS THANKS THANKSSS AGAIN FOR WRITING ON OUR BEHALF! SOMEONE NEEDS TO TELL THE WORLD THAT WE DESERVE TO EMJOY OUR TEEN YEARS!
    The education system should stop obsessing over numbers. You said it beautifully!

  13. This is so good story.. you have brilliantly raised the issue of marks and forceful fulfillment of ambitions by parents…

    BTW, no posts for a long time… hope you are good….

  14. Brilliant story. So many lives around crash under different kinds of pressures but this type is worst. It comes with a guilt of letting down the most important people in that phase of life and on top of that is the confusion, the inner voice that shrieks silently,’ I have not let you down, ‘

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